MAGAZINE

The mind-blower was that when they got out of their rental car they were........you already looked at the picture, didn't ya?..........wearing KILTS! Now, these cats carried those extra outfits half way around the world for a fun gag and there was only one mug there to appreciate their sense of humor. Well, the world (17 readers, 2 detractors and 1 fan) now knows how cool they are.

But don't feel sorry for us. We three bumpkins sat around, kicked tires, ate, drank, had ceegars and brought one another up to speed on - not worldwide rod events - but on our own personal, tiny rod worlds on either side of the Atlantic. They, too, were more interested in a microcosmic look at things. They enjoy their avocation for themselves and their mates; it's not undertaken so the world can SEE them enjoying it.

We jived about the different lifestyles that may accompany gearhead endeavor, agreed that some of the more showy, other-directed styles were not for US; we defined to our satisfaction those different levels , then we offered the conclusion: IT'S ABOUT THE IRON. Yeah, Podnuh, It's about the iron.

NEW BEST FRIENDS FROM SCOTLAND

Liam walked toward the Hop Up Cragar, took a pull off his MGD, then a toke from his cigarette, leaned on the roadster and looked back at us over his shoulder................ "Yer right........It's about the IRON."

Although, bein' in a whacked 33 Coupe with a hole in the muffler can make you FEEL like Marlon Brando in 'The Wild One'..........", in reality some of us have got a grey beard, sagging pecks, and a belt with our name on it.....who're we kiddin'? It's about the iron. You're doing the deed with old rods and customs, exploring your knowledge, adding to it and USING the stuff. And it doesn't matter to us if the other cats have poodle skirts and fuzzy dice....is the iron GOOD? OK, then. (Just a thought for Douglas, Liam: In the 50's, did Scots have POODLES on their KILTS?)

Now, some of the lifestyles are cool. God, it'd be nice to be as cool as some of these guys today. But we (I) can't be that guy. We CAN have his car.(Or he can have OUR car). It matters not what the lifestyle was 'back then.' .....it's the cars of 'back then' that have validity. So we do 'em. Build 'em, drive 'em, read about 'em, buy 'em, sell 'em, store 'em, dismember them, race 'em, revolve (evolve?) around 'em. It's about the IRON. Not the lifestyle.So we're going to see cats from every conceivable lifestyle doin' this foolishness. We are everybody from 'The Wild One" to "Happy Days" and in between.......Everybody is cool in his own way, because..........

IT'S ABOUT THE IRON.

Our Scottish colleagues have also formed the SCTA, as shown on their shirts:

SOUTHERN CALEDONIAN TIMING ASSOCIATION

Footnote: Douglas will be here on business this month, and has extended the trip to include the Rattle Can Nationals. Sure hope somebody shows up this time!

But their impression of OUR iron is still a Boyd-Mobile they saw on a Forbes Magazine or something. It's that popular vision that makes Hop Up Guys unique. There are still a bunch fewer of us than there are of the other rod persuasions And we are a little suspect to the unwashed because we don't react when they say "What color's it gonna be?" If we DO react, we say "It's already done." ""No paint?" "Nope."

Fraud-rodders would talk 'em blue in the face about how many coats of hand- rubbed something-or-other it's going to get, and "Did you know that we will put CLEAR paint over THAT?" "And that costs even MORE" "And fine Corinthian leather...." All this, typically, to dazzle someone he'll never see again.

But THEY wouldn't drive the car in primer anyway, because they wouldn't want the fans to think they couldn't AFFORD a paint job. A Hop Up Guy knows that EVERYBODY whose opinion matters already knows EVERYTHING there is to know about his car and his personal finances.........Himself........ Number one....... Rodney...... The Hop Up Guy. No one else needs to know if he's rich or poor......

So if it used to be that a hot rodder was unique, stood out, a little AVANTE GARDE, because he Hopped Up old (20 year old?) cars, it hasn't changed much for US. We are still a little bit unique, kinda basic, a little iconoclastic in that we still don't CONFORM to our community. The community at large is billet smoothie, resto-somethings and all that; we aren't in lock-step so we must be NON-CONFORMISTS.

That's it!!!!!!! We're the BEATNIKS of the millennium. Maynard G. Crebbs in a three- window.

Torn sweatshirt, straggly beard.................. far niente.......maybe it's a Hawaiian shirt hangin' out, sleeve blows up a little when you hang your left hook out to signal (You don't have BLINKERS, do you?) and disclose the bottom of the tattoo on that big-but- aging bicep. The cheap sunglasses close the case for the observer, the lady in the minivan. "I hope that person - who is poverty-stricken and has probably pawned his dying mother's jewelry for that AWFUL, noisy, old car - isn't going into the same center the kids and I are going into! Oh, no, the Reggae Music store is right next to the Fitness Center I'm taking Charmaine and Buffy to while I go have my toenails done. He'll get out right next to us and sneer, and be intimidating....and, and.........my goodness! He went into the Dean-Witter Office. Will he ROB them?"

Behind those CHEAP SUNGLASSES is the man who owns the shopping center.

Ain't nobody's business but his own.

"Candy's dandy
But liquor's quicker;
You can drink all the likker
Down in Costa Ricker..........
Ain't nobody's business but your own."