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MAGAZINE
![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-2.jpg)
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| "Show Me" Deuce |
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Brother Stevens from out in Cabool, MO. stopped by Bonneville on the way home in his fresh deuce roaster and, yes, cynics, there we go, using a Pal's car again. Like we're gonna let this one go to the Bigs?
![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-3.jpg)
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| WHOSE CAR IS THIS? |
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We feel kinder bummed: the original owner of this car gave us the photo at Fathers Day and - maybe cuz we were all buzzed by the preservants in the Hop Dogs. Dunno. We just flat-assed lost track of the origin of the photo. We do remember that it was the cat what owned (or owns) the car. Help .
![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-4.jpg)
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| NEW RIDE OUT OF LOWE KUSTOMS |
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![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-6.jpg)
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| CUSTOM FANS CAME OUT IN DROVES |
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Steve Lemmons is our Stringer in the Pac NW; we've used his cars here on the web and in the Annuals and here, he snuck in to the open house at Don Lowe's Lowe Kustoms. Wonder if they knew his background? Wonder if they know he's a couple degrees off TDC - if ya know what I mean?
Anywho, he pulled it off, got fed, got pics, and got out without bein' found out.
![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-5.jpg)
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| FIND-WINDER |
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A note in winder number 2 said something about it being a barn-car and not a Rat Rod.
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| ED (ALVISO ROADSTERS) IS ALL MOCKED-UP |
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It's not working as well as it does with kids. Few calls. We're not sure that you out there are really trying to help us find the missing scrapper. It's like you are enjoying the fact that we...your humble e-servants...are without a vital part of our anatomy....our hot rod, Man!!!!!!
We got no shot. No chance at cool. We can't cruise the pike knowing that....... in honor of our predecessors...we are lookin' good. We ain't. How can we be?!!! Somebody's got our HOT ROD!!!!!!!
There was a supposed sighting in York.
There was a photo in the snow....lots of snow.
There was evidence of some kinda.....Voodoo... Shrine.... made to it..... in some kinda tent. There were other victim cars around that showed signs of 'run deprivation'. We think they were at....at......a....................a Rod Stop!!!!
No respect.
If that coupe sits still too long..it'll seize.......it'll play no more........so we're goin' in.....
We're puttin' together a Repo Posse......yeah, a bunch of tangle-toothed, hairy-legged, slow-talkin' hot rod daddies who know how to pick a lock.......hot-wire a car........ stripe a driveway. ..an' drink whiskey......'least that's what we hear......
So......they're gonna head east in September. Hop a freight. And'they're goin'to reckon with them cretin pretenders - whoever they are - that got that rattly, wobbly', P.O.S Jive Five held hostage in some outbuilding.......sensory deprivation, ya know... hiway deprivation......tryin'to break its'will.....an'prob'ly wringin'their greasy hands in delight that 'them Californicators'don't know where their hot iron is. ....or who's got it......or if they can get it back...well...it may be the BIG one. The Duel. The Showdown. Final Eliminator.
We got this disgusting vision of unwashed, unshaven miscreants with dirty fingernails.........
Oh........never mind....that's the posse......
It looks like it'll be the grand finale: East vs. West. Gas vs. Pop. Billet vs. trad....comedy vs. tragedy ....black hats/white hats.... The sweepstakes. We may find out next month if real HOP UP GUYS originated in the East....or the West.
It ain't gonna be pretty.
We got this letter from the car itself. Read it see if you don't think those right coasters have stripped the parts from the distributor - you know - a kind of brainwashing - and reprogrammed it to their perverted, wrong-coasted way of thinking:
MARK
HELP HELP HELP
I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM THEY MAKE ME DO THINGS THEY MAKE ME GO TO MUDDY PLACES FULL OF DEAD CARS AND THEY PUT HEAVY GREASY THINGS IN MY REAR I TRAVEL WITH OTHERS LIKE ME AND THEY MAKE US GO REALLY REALLY FAST THEY ARE ALWAYS GETTING PINK PAPERS FROM COWBOYS WITH CARS WITH FLASHING RED LIGHTS
THEY ARE ALWAYS LEANING ON ME AND EATING AND DRINKING LOTS OF YELLOW STUFF IN BOTTLES I HEAR THEM TALKING ABOUT A RANSOM DEMANDING TIRES PARTS AND GAS MONEY
MARK HELP PLEASE HELP ME DON'T SEND RANSOM
I DON'T WANT TO GO HOME
JIVE FIVE
![Click for larger version]](/pictures/aug03/hopup-7.jpg)
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| VICTIM CAR SEEMS TO BE IN HOSTAGE FAUX FAMILY SITUATION |
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It's not about you. Sorry. I love ya, man, but it's not about you. We're on a course (coarse?) here that says, "Fill it up with automotive sensory experience ..classic sports, rod, custom, stocker, lawnmowers...and just keep adding to it reading..looking, listening (do you ever just focus on the audio of your day/life as a hot rod cat?) and doing whatever you can whenever you are able, financially, spiritually or whatever. And when we're old enough to chronicle the whole continuum of it to somebody, nobody will give a shit and there will be no one to whom to chronicle and that's the point. It's for Ol' Mort where we are, ya know?"
It's snot really as selfish as it sounds.
Y'all are part of it, but if you are still there...when our teef are fallin'out and more hair is growin'out of our ears than our head.......you won't wanna listen to the load either.
Ya got your own.
There will be reminiscences and books and photo albums (maybe we oughta start one o'them) and maybe a few special books on hot rods and customs...and..if we are not totally derelict.....an old car or something...that you can go lean on...sit in......smoke a stogie in.....smell the leather...or feel the cracks in it and know that you wore that prick right flat out......yourdamnself.
An'you can run your hand along the fender beads (substitute fender reveals if highboy) and solemnly testify to that piece of machinery...to that inanimate animate object...to that piece of rolling sculpture... that you had got it all along..and that's the reason that it is here...in this state...appreciated...and it is/was a monument to a lifetime of understanding something that is/was noble and worthwhile and historic and nostalgic and it transported you and it delivered you.....and it was your calling card to the humans that you had chosen to be around...and it was good.
Ya better make the memories every day...even if your Ol'Lady thinks you're obsessed. She'll eventually get it.......or get over it.
You know who you are.
No, not you . Paranoid?
Joe Mac Rebuilds Ford Stuff Hell, NO! Nobody wants to work on your V8-era trans. OR the banjo rear-end. I sure wish Joe Mac Clelland was around.................... He is, of course. The trans-master turns them around in about a day and you can find him at: (909) 371-3111, in Corona, Cal. |
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